Ted Danson
I was in Tesco’s the other day, in the pet food aisle to be exact, I don’t have any pets but I enjoy the smell of marrowbone, reminds me of school. So anyway, there I am, when I catch sight of someone really familiar. TED DANSON! It was fucking TED DANSON. What was he doing here? Who cares? TED DANSON!
I panicked a little, and knocked over some “2 for 1 Go-Cat” (But they put up the price anyway so it’s not even that good an offer). What was I to do? The one and only Ted Danson was in Tesco with me! I wanted an autograph with him, at least, or maybe a photo. Maybe he’d fancy a Wimpy or something. Not in a gay way, but like you know, 2 mates going for a quick Wimpy. Ted could be my best mate.
I composed myself and followed where Ted had been lurking. I turned the corner of the aisle, past the cheap stationary (£1 for a pencil sharpener, pencils, protractor, ruler, eraser and compass, hmm, not bad. I tried not to be distracted by the various bargains. I saw Ted heading back past the pet section, and aiming for the cheese. I scuttled over, nervous as hell. Ted Danson in Tesco! Oh my God!!! He was lifting some Irish Cheddar. My palms were sweaty and I was shaking a little. I approached Ted. My GOD!..
It wasn’t Ted. Didn’t even really look like him. I paid for my items and left. x
I panicked a little, and knocked over some “2 for 1 Go-Cat” (But they put up the price anyway so it’s not even that good an offer). What was I to do? The one and only Ted Danson was in Tesco with me! I wanted an autograph with him, at least, or maybe a photo. Maybe he’d fancy a Wimpy or something. Not in a gay way, but like you know, 2 mates going for a quick Wimpy. Ted could be my best mate.
I composed myself and followed where Ted had been lurking. I turned the corner of the aisle, past the cheap stationary (£1 for a pencil sharpener, pencils, protractor, ruler, eraser and compass, hmm, not bad. I tried not to be distracted by the various bargains. I saw Ted heading back past the pet section, and aiming for the cheese. I scuttled over, nervous as hell. Ted Danson in Tesco! Oh my God!!! He was lifting some Irish Cheddar. My palms were sweaty and I was shaking a little. I approached Ted. My GOD!..
It wasn’t Ted. Didn’t even really look like him. I paid for my items and left. x
